Showing posts with label too many cooks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label too many cooks. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

WTF FRIDAY! YMS: COOL CAT SAVES THE KIDS! (CALL THE POLICE!)





Cool Son: Cool Cat? Cool Cat! Why's he dancing Dad?

Cool Dad: Because we have to watch him.

Cool Son: He didn't do anything uncool?

Cool Dad: Because he's the hero Hollywood deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So we'll watch him. Because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a fursuit guardian. A watchful predator. A Cool Cat.

Cool Son: Gross.

Monday, March 23, 2015

MUSIC MON! I MISS CREEPY INTERSTELLAR HORROR AND SPACE GAME SEQUELS!


Sometimes I miss sleep. Sometimes I miss more sleep.
Sometimes I miss creep. Sometimes I miss more creep.


League of Legends can be a meat grinder.


But it is nothing compared to the emotional meat grinder that the characters go through in my second favorite film of 2014, Interstellar. The film's thesis is like a blackhole: dark and empty and all-consuming but tinged with light. Maybe I'm stretching for an analogy but, for a three hour long film, I really enjoyed the experience.


Prey 2 is dead. Long live Prey 2?

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

WTF WED! EVERY 90'S BABY KNOWS THE CHA-CHA-CHA! (FRANK GRIMES TOO)


I gotta admit... I saw the punchline coming with this one... BUT I DID NOT SEE THE EXECUTION COMING! Not only was the production value of this video top notch and the comedy equal parts disturbing & hilarious, it actually made me queasy (especially the uncensored version which, literally, adds about five seconds). Watch it and see for yourself.

I think it is worth pointing out that between stuff like this and TOO MANY COOKS we have reached a new and dangerous (but exciting) era in our internet nostalgia-based comedy-- we have reached the 8th season of Simpsons here, kids. That's right. We are in Frank Grimes territory.

"Who's Frank Grimes?" you ask, gormlessly, oblivious to the watershed 23rd Episode of the 8th Season of the Simpsons. (Don't watch the next link if you don't like spoilers)

HOMER'S ENEMY(spoilers)

Frank Grimes was a character introduced into Springfield in the 8th season of the Simpsons and is clearly designed to be a new straight-laced foil to Homer's chicanery. It is a pretty classic sitcom set-up-- a character, in this case Homer, can't accept that another character disliked them and, in their attempts to win them over, just make things worse. Usually, the lesson to be had in such episodes is that you can't please some people. But that's not the case in Homer's Enemy.

Frank Grimes isn't just a guy who, for no reason, dislikes Homer. He is a meta joke created to be a cynical critic of the Simpsons, specifically the beloved buffoon Homer, from the perspective of a decent and hard-working human being that somehow exists in a universe where a dumb, violent and clumsy Homer is not only beloved by all but is rewarded for his actions by being put in a position of authority-- Homer is in charge of safety at the nuclear plant-- and, despite the show pretending Homer lives in an average or even below average middle class lifestyle, lives in a big house, with a family that loves him, can go on trips, eat lobster on a whim, etc, while Grimes, a much more realistic representation of a real person, is considered to be off-base for even pointing out the bizarre logic that Springfield's universe follows. The fact is that, if you had to deal with a person like Homer Simpson, despite the fact that he is well-meaning, loves his family, and is a goofy character, etc., you would most likely find his behavior and mistakes to be criminally negligent and he would, probably, be in jail or, even more likely, dead. Much like that last sentence, the episode takes a dark turn and, perhaps worst of all, Springfield is untouched by this character's addition.

Frank Grimes comes and goes, like any other subject of the week, and is completely forgotten by the next week. He does come up in later episode(s) but these are one-off jokes. Nods to the audience. Because, while Springfield wasn't affected by Frank Grimes, the audience was affected. They were split between people who saw this episode as mean-spirited and people (like myself) who appreciated the writers having the guts to take the show into a daring direction.

In fact, Homer's Enemy might just be my favorite episode. And some of the new videos being made for mass consumption are embracing the very things that make Homer's Enemy such an important episode for long time fans.

Moving on...


Tom Ska is all about the bizarre and off-putting humor as well and this joke, a rather simple joke, is taken to a logical conclusion in a way that is both satisfying and upsetting. Why is the latter fine in comedy? Comedy, in my opinion, is based on the defiance of expectations.

The reason that "Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!" is such an elementary joke is that is a very simple example of this concept. The expectation of the audience, who has somehow never heard this joke, is that there is a trick answer to the riddle. And there is! The trick answer is that there is no trick answer. The most obvious answer to the question is the answer. Arguably, this is anti-humor, but that's discussion for another day.

My point is that comedy is about the unexpected. Like me going on a Simpsons based rant up above and the other random musings, with hints of scholarly tone, I have been typing for the last thirty minutes or so...


The pacing and tone of TVMAXWELL takes things even further by integrating horror staples into their comedy that will make you uncomfortable. And being uncomfortable, once again, is a vital part of comedy. Laughter is a nervous  response given by primates when exposed to behavior they don't have other behavioral responses for. This is the reason why you laugh when you're tickled and the reason you laugh when something odd or disturbing happens that you don't know how to respond to otherwise. Or some bull*** like that.

I'm done being intellectual for the day. Time to binge on chicken wings and pop.

Saturday, January 17, 2015

2014 YEARLY ROUND-UP! PART 2! JULY-DECEMBER!

THE 2013 YEARLY ROUND-UP!

The second half of 2013 was filled to the brim with expectations being met:

E3 2014's Nintendo conference set up a bunch of expectations with announcements about upcoming software and hardware and it subsequently began delivering them in the second half of 2014, Guardians of the Galaxy came out in August and defied all of the naysayers and Interstellar was stellar (deal with it), I filled up my time with shows like Fringed, Kill la Kill, and Bojack Horseman, Weird Al released an awesome new album, I played amazing indie video games like Shovel Knight and (subsequently discovering Kickstarter), discovered Loot Crate and began collecting figures and so many other little bits of entertainment inspired my articles and gave me something to look forward to every week.

Perhaps, even more important, I enjoyed these things all the more by sharing time with my friends because, while I looked forward to Guardians of the Galaxy and Smash Bros. for months before their release, I always look forward to hanging out with my friends every week.

And that's certainly something to think about as I look forward to 2015 being the year I get back in the creative saddle.

Part one can be found HERE.

Let's a-go.

JULY


Well, I got really into developing material from a continental map to custom races when I developed my first setting for Pathfinder, Nyumeneera.

Nyumeneera is reflective of a lot of influences in my media consumption from Game of Thrones to Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. It also incorporated ideas I had tried to use in other settings like "Half-dragons" and Hulderbergs, but also introduce a less vague world history. The setting started out as a few concepts for an A D & D game but, after I came up with a couple of building blocks, it inevitably became my own; I wanted an eladrin empire and a continent dominated by dragons.

The continent dominated by dragons was something I had been toying with for a long time but the way dragons shaped the world of Nyumeneera made it far more integral to the world design. As for the elves, the idea started simply by making the elves like the British Empire. The brilliant idea was to combine these two forces into a pact that was reminiscent of DS9's Dominion in that the Eladrin were basically benevolent tyrants that valued peace and order over freedom and an alliance with brutish dragons was a lesser evil the eladrin would tolerate to achieve their ends.

I just converted my campaign to 5th edition and I can't wait to get further into the story. I am glad to have seen my heroes already deal with some of the injustice of this world and the more complicated moral issues at hand in this far more serious setting. Easy answers do not always present themselves and sometimes the right thing to do is the wrongest thing you can do.


It has been six months since I recorded a Let's Play. I have several means to ramify this situation and plans that are in the ether. Stay tuned.


Shovel Knight would probably be my favorite game of the year if it didn't have to contend with Super Smash Bros 4 and if it was longer. Still, for a 2D platformer adventure game, it is a masterpiece on par with the best Mega Man games and should be bought/experienced by everyone who likes video games.

The gameplay, the character designs, the art, the humor and the music make for a perfect gaming experience that will be oft imitated but rarely matched in years to come.

On a side note, failing to kickstart this project, and others but especially this project, definitely made me turn my attention to Kickstarter since, while many projects are let-downs, Shovel Knight was such a rounding success.


Weird Al is not the Prince of Pop. He is the KING OF POP... music parody.


AUGUST


Jontron is still my favorite comedic game critic with his bizarre comedy, reminiscent of Tim & Eric, making every single video he produced this year a gem!


After Vel'Koz, my favorite champion to be released is definitely Gnar thanks to his adorable persona and fun mechanics.

And, y'know, I have mained a lot of ADC this year but, when I don't ADC, I tend to fill the gaps. The lane I am least comfortable with is Top Lane because so many of my friends play Top that I don't know the ins and outs of the champs and don't enjoy 1 v 1 play as much as others do. Still, lately my favorite top pick has been Gnar due to his ability to turn unlikely fights in his team's favor.


I am actually awaiting my sixth Loot Crate as I write this article and I gotta say that I have considered canceling the service, occasionally, but I have come to accept it as part of my rituals due to two points:

I love all of the figures I have gotten from Loot Crate that are honestly worth the price of admission alone. They spoiled me with my first crate thanks to the inclusion of not only a Glow in the Dark Groot Funko Pop but an awesome Ooze Action Michelangelo from Kidrobot.

The other reason I love the crates is that they give me a monthly scheduled event that can inspire reflection on the events of the weeks leading up the box's arrival. And that's actually kind of a neat added bonus.

If you ever wanna get in my headspace, these articles often have a lot of bloggy goodness.

SEPTEMBER


Few games have such the possibility to be addictive to so many gamers while giving other gamers motion sickness from the nose dive that comes from riding the high of this Bungie title to only come to the crashing conclusion that game is fun but too flawed and repetitive to really keep your interest for more than a few weeks. It is sort of like buying an exotic fish. First, you take it home and you show it off and you kind of smile and can't wait to get more fish and show them off. Then, you realize the fish takes a lot of work to maintain and that, once you've watched him swim through the pirate ship at the bottom of his tank a dozen times, nothing is gonna change and there isn't much you can do with your tropical fish.

Meanwhile, Nintendo brings over a box of puppies.

I love puppies.

(And I will unrepentantly sing my praises of Nintendo until the mess up...like by making collectible accessories that are so difficult to attain that it makes you wonder if they hate money).

And I gotta say I'm a little smug that I saw through Destiny's shallow but pretty exterior faster than some of my friends. Shrug.


Dunk is love. Dunk is life.

And this year he definitely stood out on my youtube feed so much that, every time I saw one of his videos pop up, I instantly knew I was in for a good time.

For other great Dunkey videos make sure to check out:

Final Boss and Overpowered.

WTF WED! WE HAVE TO GO TO CHURCH, DISNEYLAND, & SPRINGFIELD!?

I really should right troll articles more often.

Also, True Detective was good for my brain. I often say things are good for my brain. Because I am an idiot. Or whatever.


In retrospect, thanks to the perspective of the subsequent crates I received and after making comparisons to past crates, the Galactic Crate deserved a 5/5.

The Alien figure and Tribble were my favorite inclusions, the Firefly money is a fantastic fan piece and the crate's contents and design weren't as overly involved as some of the more recent boxes I've gotten.

OCTOBER


This was the funnest game design articles I've written since the genius of Poro Poro's design for League of Legends; it combined my creativity with my knowledge of the character and worked it into the constraints of a particular game. In this case, I put Shovel Knight, a relatively new but I think destined to be beloved hero, in the ever expanding cast of Super Smash Bros.

And the results?

Shovel Knight would make for a helluva fun inclusion in Smash Bros 5!


This month became crazy because it also included a second weekly RPG session, this time on Wednesdays, in the form of a 5th edition game every Wednesday as Geth Dawnbreaker the Northern Cleric of Lathander, Folk Hero of Phandalin, and all-around team health smoothie machine.

I love the game and, while it is sometimes hard to work in a game session, I am glad that I manned up and joined it.

On a side note, roll20.net is a good resource if you wanna do an online campaign.



This article was culmination of a lot of weird and stressful days this year and how sometimes when you mine for gold you end up hitting a sewage pipe instead and have to make necklaces/goblets out of the teeth and other weird stuff people flush.

It was also the confession of my attempts to re-enter popular anime fandom and to acknowledge that some of the youtube stuff I find funniest is totally effed up.

And that's probably okay. I think. Maybe.


Or maybe I should embrace the weird and scary as part of WTF Wed's basic pledge to be my audience's custodian to these things and try to show them the little odd gems that I find in the crevices and nooks down in the pits of internet hell.

Or I should embrace the troll-side of this blog.


About six months ago, critics were arguing that Guardians of the Galaxy was either gonna make or break the continued success of the Marvel Universe.

I would laugh but why laugh when I can instead simply sip my invisible tear and await the next decades oversaturation of super hero films.



I need to GM more Call of Cthulhu in 2015. Seriously.


Did you notice I have been doing more stuff on my blog about myself this year and trying to document my life better? Maybe that's part of getting older or maybe I am just getting more confident? Or maybe I just had enough things that were worth sharing this year?

On the subject of the Fear Crate, it is my least favorite crate thus far, though I have mellowed and like the shirt more than I did upon initial review.

P.S. Holy crap! I had a lot of stuff going on in October!

NOVEMBER


This video is probably my favorite viral video of 2014.

It is surreal, it is horrifying, and it is funny. This is the sort of thing that I would expect to put away in a box under my bed like I was embarrassed to enjoy it but, much my surprise, the internet embraced this oddity.

I guess they also embrace Kim Kardashian's fake butt, so that's not saying much.


This article speaks for itself.


This crate was a bust, in my opinion, besides the shirt.

As or the month of Novemeber, everything was about shopping for Christmas, collecting Amiibos, and surviving until I could play Super Smash Bros 4.

DECEMBER


I have a lot of opinions for a film that comes out in about a year that I've only seen about 80 seconds of footage of spliced with cuts too black but, hey, it is Star friggin' Wars!

Besides perhaps Batman V. Superman, no film has me more anxious and excited.


Perhaps it isn't clear why I've spent so much time this year obsessing over and talking about Smash Bros 4:

1. It is the latest chapter in the Smash Bros series since the 2006 installment of Brawl on the Wii.
2. It is the first truly killer exclusive for the Wii-U (The first console I've ever paid for with my own money and have fallen in love with despite spending most of my gaming time playing on my PC).
3. It has so many of my favorite characters that represent a good bulk of my childhood memories and adult ones too! (I have a wall of amiibos for crap sake)
4. Even before I played the demo back in June, I knew that it would deliver on the promises of Sakurai.
5. I will be playing Smash Bros. 4 just about every week until Smash Bros 5!

That last fact is serious business.

Srs bizniz.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

WTF WED! MAGIC MAPS, DANCING SNAKES, AND GAY FIRE-NINJA INFERNOS!


Time to dump out the last of the contents left over from last year's WTF Wednesday folder by looking at three videos I couldn't quite get rid of nor could I find the perfect article to share them until just right about now:

First up, we've got a pretty funny bit of commentary in the form of pointing out that, thanks to the modern map system in adventure/open-world games, things are a lot easier than they would be otherwise because the map system: provides detailed locations of people, places, things, objectives, etc., allows for fast travel, tracks enemies, can be zoomed in and out, has practically no limit to how many areas, biog and small are mapped, and is convenient to use.

Are we better off with or without the map?


Many people rightfully credit Bob Fosse as the sole engineer for Michael Jackson's dance choreography as the Prince of Pop copied almost all of his trademark moves from Bob Fosse's performance from the 1974 film, The Little Prince.

Weird.

Oh! And there is a new animated film adaptation of the classic French fable coming soon to cinema near you.

BONUS: LE PETIT PRINCE TRAILER!


The Onion stills brings it.

It is brought.

Monday, November 17, 2014

MUSIC MON! HOW TO COOK GREEN EGGS AND BOOM BABY!


I was a pretty big fan of Dunkey's latest album and one of the more abstract jams was about a man named "Sam" and his "Green Eggs and Ham" of Dr. Seuss fame. It is a pretty fun and fast paced little tune and this animated video is super cute. Check it out.


The new Sonic the Hedgehog game is bad.

In other news, he is blue, wears red sneakers, and eats chili dogs. Also, his games are no good.


"This is the story of COOKS — Cybernetic Operational Optimized Knights of Science — defending humanity against Beast Rebels of the Hellscape. When it comes to the future, you can never have too many COOKS."

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

WTF WED! AN INTERVIEW WITH GOD: ANIME, TOYS, & HORROR ABRIDGED!


Krillin was my favorite Dragon Ball Z character as a kid. I mean, I wanted to be Gohan up until the point that he became Saiyaman, but I always had a fondness for Goku's best friend, side kick, and comedy relief, Krillin.

In a show with battles between super villainous monsters and usually the uber innocent and pure Goku, Krillin, while arguably the most powerful human alive, was also human. Krillin was a brave Z-Warrior but he was capable of fear (often having to hide from stronger opponents), love (falling in love with Android 18), and anger (he wanted to finish off an injured Vegeta after he and Nappa directly led to the death of not only most of his friends but hundreds, if not thousands, of people but Goku stopped him).

Krillin may often be the butt of jokes in the nostalgic memeverse but he will always be a great character in my book.


Speaking of nostalgia, it was revealed that Disney/Pixar are making a Toy Story for a 2017 cinema release and, to my pride, most people are confused, upset, and even angry with the audacity of continuing the franchise with a direct sequel.

Each Toy Story film upped the ante from the simply tale of identity and friendship of the first film, dealing with love and loss in the tolerable second film, and the issues of abandonment and death in the heartbreaking third film. After the third film, in which the toys bond over their acceptance of their fate and the inevitability of their purpose/lives eventually ending, what is left to explore in the incredibly dark world of sentient toys?

Seriously Pixar, I thought you guys made art first and franchises second. Then again, Cars. Cars 2. Planes. Planes: Fire and Rescue. Inevitably, Cars 3: Carpoacalypse.

Sigh.


The Onion is on fire lately. This interview confirms everything that I imagined about the allusive figure behind everything from the holocaust to Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.

I need to find some food.