Hello friends and film addicts,
I declared
the Summer of 2011 to be my "Summer of 101 Movies!". It wass my goal to
watch 101 movies I have never seen or finished by the end of the summer.
I decided to put myself through this rigorous challenge after an
argument I had with my friend, Zach Stanifer, over the fact that I want
to write movie scripts but have missed out on alot of classics and
blockbusters over the years. It was in that moment that I decided to
challenge myself to expand my pallet and discover what the big screen
could do for me through DVDS, Bluray and instant Netflix!
Here goes my fourth and final blurb bomb!
P.S. I've just start 2012 "Summer of 51 Films" and will do my first blurb round-up on Sunday.
Quick note on my rating system?
*/5. So Bad Its Good- If
I give a movie a "*," that means a special little turd. Its a movie
that is so bad that its hilarious (even if the directors didn't mean to
make it that way). These movies are great for sharing with friends and
tearing it apart. Ex. The Room, Care Bears Movie II: A New Generation,
Mac and Me.
1/5 Kill It With Fire, If I give a
film a rating of "1" it means the movie isn't just bad. It is barely a
movie or so offensive that to even uses a single sensory organ to
witness it would be an insult to the heavens. If I give a movie a 1,
avoid it at all costs. The film is pure garbage.
Kill it with fire. Ex.
Shrek The Third
, Punisher: Warzone, 10,000 B.C.
2/5. Bad,
A movie that lands itself in the bad category means that, while a
failure, is not a complete failure. The movie might have some
entertainment value, like a good character/scene, but as a whole it
fails or is offensive. Ex. Wolverine Origins, Star Wars: Episode I-The
Phantom Menace, Hancock.
3/5. Okay, The
movie was neither bad nor great. Its probably worth at least once
viewing and maybe more if it really catches your fancy. This is probably
the easiest rating to give a movie. ex. Night at the Museum, Simpsons
Movie, Prince of Persia.
4/5.
Great,
These are the movie I recommend you check out at least once before you
die or it you're just bored. These are the movies that really deserve
attention and help elevate film as art and entertainment. ex. Iron Man,
How to Train Your Dragon, The 40-Year Old Virgin.
5/5. Favorite, These movies are instant classics....or at least in my book. I reserve 5/5s for movies that I
HAVE
to own and watch and share with everyone. At some point this year, I'll
probably make a list for my top 100 films. Wink. ex. Big Trouble in
Little China, Brazil, The Royal Tenenbaums.
58.
Rango.
4/5. Rango’s story is a
rather clichéd western tale of a guy going out West, posing as a sheriff
and becoming a hero. Yet, despite this recycled story, the animator
managed to take the old and give us something unique and interesting. To
further elaborate on this animated film, it stars a little pet
chameleon, Rango (Johnny Depp), who is left behind by his unwitting
owners in the middle of the desert. From there he begins a western
adventure that touches on the abstract and transpsycholigical adventure,
more than a few times for the average family film, and ends up in an
anthropomorphized Wild West town filled with funny characters, awesome
designs (the variety or desert animals, ex. Burrowing Owls, are
especially cool) and a big thirst. Water is at a premium and when Rango
starts boasting about being a gunslinger he soon finds himself the new
Sherriff of this little town.
A very cool movie in all
technical aspects of computer graphic animation- Rango stands out above
your Animal Escape and Fairy Tale parody dribble that seems to fill this
subgenre of animated fiction. Some may compare the story to Chicken
Run, which besides it being a fairly common story, is not what’s
important in Rango. It’s the characters, the comedy and the action. A
great example is Rango’s romantic interest, Beans (Isla Fisher), who is a
young woman try to keep her farm running, get to the source of the
drought and keep an eye on Rango. She is a funny parody of the strong
female romantic interest because of her odd quirk of freezing up when
stressed. On the subject of comedy, the movie provides a lot of funny
visuals, including a reference to
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, which kept me wanting to see what creative concoctions lie ahead
.
As for the action, this movie had some set pieces that were original
and thrilling, particularly a chase scene that involves Ride of
Valkyries, bats, hillbilly moles, a cross-dressing chameleon and lots of
silly explosions.
In the end, this quirky animated film is great movie for everyone, especially the varmints.
59.
Santa Slays. 1/5. I
went into this movie expecting a cheesy Christmas movie with horror
elements about an evil Santa Claus (Steven Goldberg) but instead was
greeted with a fruit cake. It had lots of nuts(shots) and it’s comedy
was rather stale. The movie begins by introducing the audience to our
evil Santa by having him kill a bunch of actors who have no business
being in this movie before actually getting to the story. The violence
of the first scene offered a view into what could’ve been a funny movie
but instead the rest falls into a boring mess. Evil Santa is going to a
little town called Hell, to defeat an Angel, so he can break the curse
that has forced him to be a generous man for over millennia.
The
concept had potential but, without the workman ship of a few good
elves, crumbled like so much gingerbread house under the strain of
Santa’s fat foot.
60.
Little Bigfoot. 1/5. Boring, boring, boring.
61.
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. 5/5.
I originally gave it a 4 but I had to give it a higher rating because
this movie does having something classic in it. Johnny Depp completely
captures the persona of “Raoul Duke,” a self-parody of the original
story’s writer, Hunter S. Thompson. He does this so much so that,
despite the fact Thompson said he didn’t like the movie adaptation, he
loved Depp’s performance. The performance when coupled with some of the
more funny/memorable/poignant lines produces a perfect role for the
actor (so much so I have been quoting the movie ever since I watched
it). The tale is confusing but the premise is simple. A writer, Raoul
Duke (Johnny Depp) and his lawyer, Dr. Gonzo (Benicio Del Toro) go on a
drug fueled trip through Las Vegas that has them experience the best and
worst that the city had to offer in 1971, all while drugged out of
their minds, hallucinating and getting into deeper and deeper paranoia.
Terry
Gilliam directs this spectacle of a film with great panache, giving us
really cool hallucinations, all from the perspective of our narrating
“friend” Duke that gives us a look into a different time, place and
perspective. The traditional, gritty special effects and atmosphere that
are created give off a variety of emotions. From the dark moments of
fear, to the hot moments of rage, to the mellow moments of malaise and
back to the calm of the blue skies that hang over head as our heroes
race across the desert in a half-destroyed car.
In the end, it is “too weird to live, but too rare to die.”
62.
Phantasm. 3/5.
A young boy, his brother and their friend combat the forces of evil
that have taken hold over the local graveyard. They face off against its
ghastly owner, simply known as the Tall Man and his army of little
horrors. My take on the film is that, while some of the special effects
in the film were interesting, that as a whole it is a mediocre affair.
As
for the effects, the most iconic horror of the movie is a spinning ball
of death that the Tall Man uses to guard his crypts. It’s a ridiculous
but interesting little thing, the size of a golf ball, that latches onto
faces, drills into them and pumps out their blood. Where the movie
loses its cred are in the “army of horrors”, which conceptually are
terrifying but in reality are little people wearing brown cloaks.
Unless you’re afraid of jawas, I wouldn’t recommend this film.
63.
Class of Nukem High. 5*/5. Oh,
Troma, you so crazy. This was my first introduction to watch a Troma
film and I am guessing it was a good choice. This movie is pure cheesy
fun and works because the makers knew what they were doing. Unlike most
movies I give an asterisk, the humor was intentional and so ridiculous,
it was funny. Taking place in the affably named, Tromaville, a city on
the edge of a nuclear power plant, our story is about two likeable (but
cardboard) teens who after smoking some radiated pot, feel ridiculous
side effects and go up against the town’s ridiculous gang of former
debate team honor students turned post-apocalyptic bikers. This film is
not for the kids as it resorts to so much sex, violence and fore for its
ridiculous humor.
I really enjoyed this film and it is the perfect film to watch with friends.
64.
The Return of the Living Dead. 3/5.
Another cool zombie film that Zach introduced to me, The Return stands
out for a few reasons above others, first and foremost, the special
effects and an original motive for the zombies. The film starts with a
teen getting a job at a medical warehouse and being shown a bunch of
military canisters with undead experiments inside of them. When the gas
in a canister is released, every dead thing in the warehouse comes to
life and the two are infected. The movie takes a turn for the cool when
we introduce a mortician who is charged with burning the zombie, which
turns out to be a fatal mistake and soon the whole graveyard is alive.
The big thing that sets these zombies alive is that they are not dumb.
They are smart, they can talk (if they still have tongue and the like)
and they explain why they want brains.
It is awesome to
see some original ideas in this movie that keep it from becoming cliché
and lost in the depths of zombie films. The acting is good enough for a
horror movie but the mortician, Ernie (Don Calfa) manages to steal every
moment with his hilarious but dedicated performance in the film. The
effects are really unique, for example, when the warehouse starts coming
to life bisected dog comes to life, whines and twitches.
I really recommend this to anyone looking for a zombie movie or a classic 80’s horror movie.
65.
The Last Airbender. 1/5. To
quote one of my favorite movies of all time this movie requires a new
word to describe how bad it is. M. Night Shamylan is wrong. And bad.
There should be a new, stronger word for his films. Like badwrong, or
badong. Yes, The Last Airbender is badong. From this moment, I will
stand for the opposite of this movie: gnodab. (Courtesy of me destroying
a quote from Kung Pow: Enter the Fist) The Last Airbender is based on a
Nickelodeon animated show that mixes fantasy, mysticism, Asian
philosophy, action and comedy into a package that is one of the best
animated shows produced by the United States, for children, in the last
decade. What M. Night Shamylan and Nickelodeon Pictures gives us is one
of the worst big budget flops in the last decade. With a budget over
$150, 000, 000 and an advertising budget of $130, 000, 000, this movie
needed to be one of the biggest films of the decade. A movie of such epically terribly proportions only deserves a review of equally epically
bad proportions.
As such I will post a full multi-page review of this terrible film on July. 28, 2011.
66.
Star Trek: The Motion Picture. 3/5. This
is most certainly the most serious of all the Star Trek films, which
allows for the picture to turn into a more serious philosophical piece
but it also makes it lack the charm of the other films. The film takes
place as a sequel to the original series with the original crew
overseeing an inspection of the Enterprise before its first voyage under
a new captain since Kirk. A strange force is moving toward Earth and
destroys all ships that comes into its path, Kirk takes control of the
Enterprise and starts to play mind games with the enemy force known as
“VGER”.
The film is a great bridge between the original
series and the movies. It takes a more serious tone, much like the
originals, but drops the cheesiness of its source material. This lays
the grounds for the more serious plots and philosophy of the sequels but
lacks the chemistry that the crew shows in the latter films. The movie
as a whole comes off a little dry, even dusty, literally.
In the end, “The human adventure is just beginning.”
67.
A Clockwork Orange. 5/5.
What is good my droogs? Stanley Kubrick’s awesome dystopian version of
Britain stands alone in the dark as a wholly original, horrifying and
fascinating film. A charismatic teenage terror, Alex DeLarge (Malcolm
McDowell) walks the streets of a dystopian desolate London overrun by
drugged up gangs where, despite his class and intelligence, he is the
best of the worst of these vandals. When he is taken to prison, he
volunteers for an experimental process that would “reform” him and allow
him to leave, but everything goes wrong. This film works because of
McDowell’s performance, the incredible writing and the world that the
audience created.
What makes this movie so unique and
entrancing is that the main character of our story is unapologetically
despicable but the audience falls in love with him. As he narrates he
calls the audience his friends and with his Shakespearean smoothness
wins us over. In the end, we even pity him as the government and
everyone else turns on him.
In the end, he is a cruel
bully, rapist, vandal, berserker, mindfucker and we all love him. And
that rubs us the wrong (right) way.
68.
The Toxic Avenger. 5*/5. Troma
manages to do it again (though I think I've watched the two "best"
films on their resume'. This is a rather simple, silly and gory story of
revenge or something. Movies like this remind me why I can't stand
modern horror. The gore in these movies goes about as far as Saw could
go but without reducing it to tawdry gore porn and instead playing it
for laughs.
‘Nuff said.
69.
Sometimes They Come Back. 3/5. Stephen
King is unwittingly the king of tropes. To be fair, many authors use
similar themes, characters and environments in their stories but his are
most egregious. This film is probably the king of that. It’s a rather
mediocre movie but based on an interesting premise. A man returns to his
hometown with his family, along with his wife and son for a teaching
job. He is haunted by his tragic past. When students start dying and
familiar faces start reappearing he realized that the same demons of his
past are comic to get him.
This would all be fine but it
is laden with Stephen King clichés. To be honest, as a fan of his
movies, this was goldmine of entertainment. Here is a list of the
clichés that show up in this movie. Maine, bullies without motives,
supernatural cars, trains, tragedies set in the early 60s, evil
greasers, flashbacks, etc.
In the end, “sometimes they come back!”
70.
Total Recall. 5/5.
This is the perfect example of a movie, that despite the fact it’s
getting a remake, it doesn’t need one. It’s the kind of movie where
everything seems to have fallen in place and if a bit of the formula
goes array the remake won’t work. Arnold Schwarzenegger plays an average
joe construction worker, Douglas Quaid, with a gorgeous wife but an
insatiable need to go to Mars. Set in a near future, where space travel
is common and Mars is dangerous planet of mutants, miners and mad men,
our average joe opts to go to
Total Rekall. It is a service
where memories of a perfect vacation can be planted into the head of its
customer and Doug gets more than he ever dreamt of.
This
film excels in many ways. From its cerebral story, to its cool
characters, to its awesome action, to its special effects and to well,
everything that makes a great science fiction film into a classic. This
really is Schwarzenegger’s best performance and possibly his best film.
The
film is iconic and is an obvious inspiration from such great films as
Inception and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Phillip K. Dick
penned it and I can guarantee you one thing. You won’t regret it if you
“get your ass to Mars.”
71.
Cedar Rapids. 5/5. I
really enjoyed this movie. It reminds me of 40-Year Old Virgin that is
far less crude, incredulous and more charming. After all, it’s a coming
of age story for a full grown man. Tim Lippe (Ed Helms,
Hangover)
is a guy that has never left his home town of Brown Valley, Winsconsin,
where he has worked for Brown Star Insurance, since he was 16 when his
mother died and is “pre-engaged” to his 7th grade teacher. Everything
changes when he is forced to go on a trip to Cedar Rapids that puts his
job, his love and his life on the line. Yet, he doesn’t do it alone as
he is joined by a fantastic cast of lower tier stars that shine like
hell in this film.
First, he meets Ronald Wilkes (Isiah Whitlock Jr.,
The Wire),
the first “Afro-American” he has ever met, and will be his roommate
under the request of Lippe’s boss, Bill Krogstad (Stephen Root,
King of the Hill). His second roommate is Dean Zeigler (John C. Reilly,
Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story)
who makes every scene a party and is everything Lippe was warned
against. The last member of our four musketeers is Joan Ostrawski-Fox
(Anne Heche,
Six Days, Seven Nights), a cute firecracker
who enjoys nothing more than ruffling the small town boy’s feathers.
This cast works incredibly well together and provides a hilarious parody
of business politics and comradery.
I would recommend
this to any fans of understated comedies, The Office or John C. Reilly.
If there is anything that I can say about this movie is that it makes
Insurance Salesman seem really cool.
72.
On Deadly Ground. 2/5 or 4*/5. This
is probably the best Steven Seagal movie. It is corny, preachy and
hilariously ridiculous. Forest Taft (Steven Seagal) is a mystical
martial artist and oil rig inspector who turns against his corrupt boss,
Michael Jennings (Michael Caine), after a spiritual experience with
some Inuit peoples of Alaska. What takes place around this relatively
simple plot is a ridiculous film that is so over the top that it had to
be produced, directed and starring Steven Seagal.
While
the action and violence that takes place in this film are decent, as
opposed to his later films where he rarely does his own stunts, the rest
is pretty much garbage. The plot is a mess, the interactions between
Forest and the Inuits range between offensive and hilarious, and the
message is heavy handed. First, let’s simply get into the mystical
bullcrap that is his spiritual awakening. To sum it up, he has a vision
quest where he stabs a bear and the bear knocks him into a river. The
only thing is…he was actually thrown in the river by the Inuits and has
to be saved from drowning! The movie is shallow and dripping in the
mystical bull that Seagal shoves in the audience’s face. What’s worst is
his environmental message. I certainly think we should work to fight
pollution but his depiction of a super evil oil tycoon and the way the
beat us over the head with the beauty of nature is horrendous.
The
cherry on the cake is the last 5 minutes or so which is nothing but
Seagal giving a power point presentation on the evils of pollution that
at times borders on paranoid and speculation but its worst crime that it
is boring. What’s worse is that apparently, Seagal originally had a
much longer version of this scene and, thank the studio, they literally
had to beg him to shorten it down. In the end, the movie is like Seagal ,
full of bull roar.
73.
Old Dogs. 2/5. Robin
Williams and John Trovolta headline this terrible Disney film that
insults the audience with every scene. While there is some potential for
poignant moments that work in other films and a few funny lines it
falls flat on its premise. Dan (Robin Williams) and Charlie (John
Travolta) are business partners and best friends on the eve of the
business deal of a life time. This is interrupted when a woman that Dan
met, married and annulled, after his first divorce, all in the same day 6
years ago. He soon discovers that she mothered him two precocious twins
and, because of her own stupidity landing her in jail for two weeks,
the woman leaves her twins with their biological father. This is
terrible. Imagine that you’re a responsible 50 years old who has just
discovered that he has been cheated out of 6 years of fatherhood? The
mother of his children is dumb or cruel. Anyway, Dan and Charlie must
work together to take care of the kids.
Yet, even looking
past this terrible premise, more pain comes from the movies more PG
attempts at humor. From cliché tanning/botox humor, to everyone thinking
Dan and Charlie are grandparents, to the annoying kids, to an old
pissing dog and finally all the gay jokes make for an abysmal affair.
The only thing that keeps the movie from completely falling down the
shitter is the chemistry and charisma of Travolta and Williams.
In
fact, the gay jokes made me realize there is only one way to save this
picture. Make it turn into a gay romance between the two headlining
actors. It would be a clever mind-f**** that audiences would never see
coming and make the movie a lot more interesting. In the end,
old dogs never learn and neither does Disney.
74.
Glimmer Man. 2/5.
After wasting my breath with a synopsis of this dumb/boring movie, I am
just going to go on a rant about why I hate Seagal’s character in every
movie I’ve seen him in so far. The Glimmer Man is about a serial killer
who is killing and crucifying his victims when Seagal’s character a cop
with mystical powers teams up with a street cop to find the murdering
psycho. It takes a sinister and personal turn when Seagal’s ex-wife is
murdered by the murder and he begins looking into his past for suspects.
Now for a short rant about why Seagal is an insufferable bastard.
In
the majority of Seagal’s movie, especially his most recent crappy
straight to DVD films where he is so out of shape that he gets out of
breath from walking, he is a producer (or god forbid director). So, it
is very easy to see how the man is allowed to play the same character in
every god awful movie. An obnoxious, bullying, know-it-all, super
powered, psychic, mystical, annoying, hypocritical, idiotic, violent,
Buddhist, ex-military secret agent, a-hole with a smug smirk. He is
always right and anyone who disagrees with him even a little is going to
be beaten or worse. He is a hypocrite because he is a Buddhist who
results to extremely brutal violence to get the job done and uses
mystical mumbo jumbo to justify everything he does. He is preachy and
smug. Did I mention he is smug? Rant could go on forever but I’d have to
see more movies starring his smugness.
75.
Contamination .7/Contamination 7/Creepers/The Crawlers/Troll 3/Troll 3: Contamination 7. 1/5. 2*/5. Its
usually a great sign when a movie has that many alternate titles right?
The sequel to Troll 2, the best worst movie of all time, and a 5*/5
fim, Contamination .7 shares the poor quality but little else. Firstly,
it has even less to do with trolls then Troll 2 (which was about evil
goblins), instead opting for man-eating, rabid (rubber) vines. This
movie is bad with a capital Filmirage stamp of piss-poor quality.
The
only things amusing in this movie are the characters of The Sheriff and
Dr. Kruger who give two of the worst laughably terrible performances in
film history. What you wanted more of a review? “You want me to
cooperate?” BANG!
76.
From Dusk Til Dawn. 4/5. A rather interesting
choice
of film for the auteur of over the top adaptations of exploitative film
style into a palatable and intelligent format for all to enjoy but it
is a rather clever choice for Quentin Tarantino. The movie starts out as
a criminal drama about two brothers (George Clooney and Tarantino) on
the run from the police. They kidnap a priest and his children as
hostages and cover to get down to Mexico. Things go array when they go
to meet a contact at a biker bar and it turns out the bikers are
vampires!
Traditional Effects! Vampires!
Explosions! Tarantino! Mexico! The movie is more than a little slow but
kicks into action in the second half and goes out kicking hard.
 |
| This movie is so obscure...I couldn't find a screen shot. |
77. Tornado. 1/5. I
went into this film expecting a terrible rip-off of the already
terrible disaster movie, Twister. Instead, we have a European movie that
has more in common with the Da Vinci Code, sprinkles in a pro-Romani
message and has a devil tornado eat a helicopter (the latter being the
only satisfying moment in the film).
78.
The Spy Next Door. 2/5. This
is a ball-bustingly bad Jackie Chan family film that lacks any of the
charm/comedy/action of Chan's older films. Bob Ho (Jackie Chan) is a
bland guy by day but by night is a Chinese spy on loan to the US.
Shenanigans ensue when he is left to care for his girlfriend’s kids
(sound familiar) and meanwhile, has to stop an evil spy with an plan so
dumb it is as evil as it stupid. This action comedy is terrible on both
fronts!
The story has been done a dozen times and in much
more interesting ways. The comedy is painfully lowbrow and without any
kind of originality. The characters are all one-dimensional, save the
pre-teen daughter, who I still ended up hating because of the way she
treated her mother and siblings. The saddest part of this movie is the
action. I guess Jackie Chan has gotten too old cuz the action relies on
cheesy special effects and Chan doing tricks that pale even next to
those of lesser martial artists.
This film is a terrible
example of why I prefer a good family film over a crappy kid movie any
day. It is not that hard to make a movie that appeals to both kids and
everyone else. Maybe I am wrong but while I can see a child enjoying
this, they would be better served watching a better Jackie Chan movie or
reading a book. Perhaps he is showing his age or perhaps the people who
produce his movies are shamelessly lazy.
79.
Howard the Duck. 3/5. This
actually went better than I expected (then again I just finished
watching two very bad movies, so...sue me). Many people consider this
the worst film Lucas ever got involved with but honestly it wasn’t
intolerable. The problem is the movie has some quirks that keep it from
being a really good movie. Some of the humor that is too shallow for
adults and some it is way too obscene for children. If you can get past
the inappropriate parts of this movie we are left with some interesting
stuff. The film is about an alien, Howard, an anthropomorphized duck
(much like Donald Duck) who is transported to Earth by accident via a
laser. The movie is strange in the fact that most people react to the
strange creature with little shock or even taking notice. Everyone who
does notice him wants to send him home (which is good), kill him (which
is stupid) or love him (which is plain weird). The movie picks up in the
third act when the laser accidentally summons an intergalactic demon
that wants to use the laser to summon its brethren and take over the
world. But not if Howard has anything to say about!
The
comedy was boring and stale. The thing that kept me watching was the
curious quirks that make this movie morbidly interesting. The fact that
no one seems to really do anything about Howard, the fact that a human
girl falls in love with him (and oh boy is she annoying) and the fact
that everything is pure silly. The only cool parts of the movie were the
special puppetry used to bring Howard to life and the evil alien who
possesses Dr. Jennings (Jeffrey Jones) and is a funny evil overlord.
In the end, a duck in the film is better than the nuke fridge.
 |
| Note: Humans cannot be ripped apart like rubber.... |
80.
Day of the Dead (1985). 5/5. I
really enjoyed this zombie flick that may be Romero's best, making me
want to go so far as to say it is the best of his original trilogy. The
film takes place in the direst stage of the undead hell that the humans
try to survive in. The zombies outnumber the humans 400, 000 to 1. The
film is about a group of scientists trying to find a way to overcome the
problem by creating a cure or taming them and butting heads with the
military men put in charge of protecting and helping the scientists. The
stress is driving everyone to the brink and the eldest scientist’s
subject, Bub, is beginning to learn and act in ways no zombie has ever
acted before.
This film is more driven by atmosphere, a
conflict of ideologies and interesting characters than its predecessors
which were driven more by the gore and violence. The conflict grows and
builds under a slick film of paranoia under the weight of the dead and
the hundreds of feet of rock hanging above the shelter our characters
live in.
After watching this film, it’s easy to see how
Night, Dawn and Day have inspired so many people to make zombie films,
for better or worse.
81.
Deadfall. 5*/5. Do you like Nicholas Cage? Do
you like Nicholas Cage making an ass of himself and stealing every
moment? Because Nicholas Cage gives his worst/best performance in this
movie. The film is a rather bland and quirky take on a conman movie.
Directed by Cage’s brother, Christopher Coppola, starring Michael Beihn
(The Terminator) as our protagonist Joe Donan, the son of a conman who
is looking for answers after his father’s accidental death. He soon
discovers that his mysterious uncle Lou (James Coburn) was his brother’s
identical twin and is the head of a racket in his home town. Lou’s
right hand man and stealer of the show is Eddie (Nicholas Cage), a
twitchy coke-head and psychopath. The plot thickens as Joe gains his
uncle’s trust, Eddie is sure that Joe is going to steal his life and
girlfriend and Joe tries to figure out the con before the con gets him.
Every
actor in this movie appears to be trying to use the material and have
fun with it, especially Cage. The problem is the material is so dry and
overdrawn that it lacks enough substance to give the actors anything to
work with. The technical aspects are unappealing and the story is just
weird.
In conclusion, I have to wonder whether Cage was
coked up to the eyeballs during this entire production or whether he
wanted to ruin his brother’s film. Despite cameos from Charlie Sheen and
Peter Fonda, the film is weak and more often boring than not. The main
attraction is Cage’s terrible performance as Eddie. Every moment of this
movie without Eddie on screen or talking is a waste of film.
Fun
Fact: Nicholas Cage is actually a Coppola, as in he is the nephew of
Francis Ford Coppola and cousin of Sofia Coppola. He created the stage
name of Nicholas Cage so that he could prove his worth without his
uncle’s clout. Furthermore, he got the last name from the Marvel
character Luke Cage.
82.
Darkness Falls. 2/5. A
mediocre and boring horror movie that resorts to jump scares. The movie
begins with a somewhat boring explanation of the monster of our movie,
basically the female version of Freddy Kruger, the Tooth Fairy. In the
small town of Darkness Falls, a vengeful spirit goes from house to house
at night, light is her kryptonite after all, and if you see her- she
kills you dead! The scene that introduces us to the protagonist and are
monster is scary enough but sets up the big flaw of the- BOO! Did that
scare you? No? Oh because, while the jump scares in the first scene is a
little grating, by the end of the movie it’s just ridiculous.
The
movie’s plot follows the protagonist from the tragedy of his first
meeting with the Tooth Fairy to his adulthood of being a tormented and
paranoid artist (afraid of the dark and paints creepy stuff). He gets
dragged back to Darkness Falls when an old friend calls and says her son
is haunted by the same spirit and is afraid of the dark. He soon finds
the Tooth Fairy wants the boy and will stop at nothing to get him. This
is where the movie falls apart. The greatest way to explain the
ridiculous suspension of belief this movie expects you to have is when
the protagonist mentions the fact that dozens of kids, from the town,
mysteriously die/disappear every year, only at night, and no one seems
to really know why (OR CARE?!)
In conclusion, I am more
disappointed with this film’s final product than anything. It's
unfortunate because the first few minutes of the movie are somewhat
promising but by the end what little interest I had was ruined by the
movies confusing rules. It’s very important in a horror movie to
establish rules that the monster/evil/deadly force has to be constricted
to.
83.
Hellbound. 3/5. ...CHUCK
NORRRISSSSS! Norris is a far better action star than Seagal. He is not
smug (he is kung-fu jesus but not in a smug way) and is generally
tolerable. This movie starts out as a D & D orgasm and develops into
a super natural thriller where Chuck Norris plays a cop trying to
defeat the devil before he regains his powers. Let me expand on that
weak synopsis and broaden the vision. The first scene in this movie is
straight out of a veteran Advanced Dungeons and Dragons session. A group
of crusaders, including a king, a bunch of knights Templar (paladins!)
and a priest (cleric!), break up a cultist meeting led by the movie
villain, a badass demonic cultist, who is the physical embodiment of
Satan. He is defeated by the cleric and the King has the evil demon’s
physical body entrapped in a tomb before leaving it there for centuries
to come. A while later, some graverobbers break in and the cultist
escape to start planning his ultimate revenge, to summon his master and
take over the world (OF COURSE!). What he didn’t expect was that his
murdering spree would be interrupted by Chuck Norris!
The
film is classic Chuck with a twist of the supernatural, ex. The evil
cultist has hypnotoad eyes, and some decent action. In the end, I
recommend this to anyone look for a sweet fix of testosterone. To be
honest, I just wish I could watch a movie about the badass, devil
stabbing, and king befriending cleric.
84. Memento. 4/5? Out
of all of the films I’ve watch over the summer; this is the one I need
to rewatch in order to give an accurate review. On one hand, the ideas
and structure of this movie are exciting but on the other hand, even I’m
left a little confused. I don’t think I could do this movie much
justice if you asked me what it was about right now. Apologies.
85. Exit Wounds. 2/5. Another
Seagal film? What makes this one special? How about the top billing of
DMX! This film was passable in a few ways. On the nose, this film is
more exciting than Glimmer Man and has some decent action scenes. In
fact, the movie opens with a scene where Seagal kicks ass and saves the
Vice President. Now, you would think saving the president would make a
hero. Wrong. In fact, he gets reprimanded for his recklessness and sent
to work in the worst beat in town. The movie seems to have to bizarre
jokes. The first is that, despite the god powers of Seagal, everyone
seems to think he is a renegade and needs to be punished. So much so
that he is made a traffic cop and is paired up with one of those wacky
comedy relief black cops you always see in garbage movies. That doesn’t
stop him from kicking ass because, unfortunately, the second joke is
that no matter what he does trouble seems to follow him and practically
piss in his face to get his attention.
The plot is in fact
incited when Seagal runs into DMX for the first time or rather his
bumbling accomplice. He literally is walking down the street, sees a
suspicious guy with binoculars, grabs them, sees it’s a drug deal and
arrests the guy. He then gets in trouble for messing up a sting
operation (led by the obviously evil antagonist cop). The cop being evil
is one of the many silly twists this movie takes. Literally, at every
turn Seagal runs into trouble, when on the first night of anger
management, he sees a car getting jacked. The guy must catch rapes in
action when he goes to take out the garbage!
What makes
this film preposterous is that, despite that the two main characters,
Seagal and his partner, are cops and all of the pathos deaths are cops
and in the ends, it is the cops who save everything, cops are evil and
corrupt. In fact, though DMX is supposed to be a bad guy, all is not as
it seemed but twice as stupid as you could imagine. All in all, this
mess is best avoided unless you’re looking for an hour and half of
Seagal’s super powers being treated like the bubonic plague by his
fellow cops.
86. Golden Child. 3/5. A
campy but passable Eddie Murphy 80’s flick, you know when he was the
king of the world and not a terrible actor, terrible Donkey and batshit
insane? I digress. This film is really a supernatural take on Murphy’s
work in cop movies during the 80’s. The plot is rather simple. An evil
servant of evil, Sansa (Charles Dance), who is seeking to turn the tide
so that evil wins and is a British fancy wizard, kidnaps “The Golden
Child” who we will call the Chosen One or if you are even more cynical
(like myself) the Mcguffin Child and tries to corrupt him. Meanwhile,
Eddie Murphy plays Chandler Jarrell who, despite the fact that many
other characters treat him like he is a bad guy, is a selfless hero who
spends his time helping children and finding lost youths of LA. The
movie begins with Chandler becoming frustrated that no one seems to care
about lost children. Suddenly, Kee Nang (Charlotte Lewis) arrives and
tasks him with finding the Golden Child, so he can save the boy and
fulfill an ancient prophecy. Chandler thinks she is cuckoo but after
learning more about the case and falling for Kee, he agrees to go to
Tibet to find a dagger that can either save the Golden Child or kill
him.
This film gets by with some funny jokes, as Murphy is
definitely on par in this movie, mixed with some good ol’ 80’s mystical
Asia camp, complete with a half-dragon fortune teller and an awesome
cameo by one of my favorites, Victor Wong. In the end, the film may be a
more magical version of Beverly Hills Cop and while not gold, it is at
least bronze.
87. Birdemic: Shock and Terror. 1/5 or 5*/5. Just wow. This movie is mind bendingly boring but in a way that makes Tommy Wiseau’s
The Room
jealous. Many people wonder whether The Room is intentionally a satire
of bad independent movies (a la Tim and Eric) or that Wiseau really
thought he was making a good film. After seeing Birdemic, I legitimately
believe that, despite the outcome, that its director/writer James
Nguyen believes he is the next Hitchcock (minus the talent, vision,
charisma etc.) It has some of the worst editing, acting and special
effects in any movie ever made.
The writing is atrociously
boring and hamfisted. The film is basically about birds attacking
California and a young couple trying to escape. The movie is an
environmental film because, you know, birds want revenge for global
warming. The environmental message is so ridiculously thrust into our
faces that there is a scene with a hippy living in a poorly rendered CG
tree house and a constant reference to some green website. The hero in
the film wants to start a solar panel company and junk. Ugh. The human
characters are boring, their story starts much like a terribly made
porno and are more flat than the main attraction. The special effects
used to create the birds are literally gifs of the same two or three
birds, doing the same motion, placed on top of the footage of people
flailing around with cg fire added in for good measure. The thing that
is unforgivably bad about this film is the sound editing. It pops and
background sounds blocks out the dialogue. The sound track is terrible,
save the oh so catchy (cough), “Hanging Out With The Family” song.
If
you're looking for an experience, this is a terrible but, much like
waking up in a bathtub of ice and discovering you still have your
kidneys, is ultimately rewarding.
88. Adam. 3/5. This
movie followed a somewhat typical romantic movie's arc with a few
twists and turns that were refreshing. The movie's main topic of
interest was a main character with Asperger’s syndrome. My best friend
has the disorder but nowhere near as crippling as the character in the
film. Adam (Hugh Dancy) is a person who lives his life differently than
most people. Every day he gets dressed, eats the same three meals and
does the same things. When the movie begins, we discover Adam has just
lost his father, who is best friend and caregiver. He doesn’t express
his grief in any obvious way. Things start to go array when he meets a
new girl at his apartment building, Beth (Rose Byrne), and he loses his
job because, like many people with his disability, he is a perfectionist
and will not sacrifice quality for quantity. Beth starts to reach out
to him and Adam seems to enjoy her company. When Beth discovers his
disability she tries her best to learn to communicate better with him
and falls in love with him. The secondary plot under the romance is
Beth’s father, Marty (Peter Gallagher), being indicted.
While
it is refreshing to see a film about such an important subject matter,
and it is handled rather maturerly, the movie is not all it could be.
Some of the twists in the plot and the acting were a little weak. In the
end, the film is much like Adam, it is not perfect and it’s a little
confused but it is ultimately good.
89. Troll Hunter. 5/5. As
far as fake documentary films go, this is not only of the more original
ones, it is also the coolest. Forget your vomit inducing cthulic
Godzilla
Cloverfields and your silly
Blair Witch Projects.
I want trolls. A quick note, perhaps I am a bit biased. After all, I
used to spend many an afternoon riding around in my grandpa’s pick-up
truck. The two of us had made a game out of looking out into the woods,
as we drove, for interesting sights. Whether it was a half-demolished
silo or an odd looking stump, if it looked creepy or cool, it was
obviously the work of trolls. This film plays upon the Norwegian folk
tales of trolls. Not internet trolls but big bad nasty trolls with big
noses, long tails and an inability to properly convert Vitamin D. The
film is about a young film student crew investigating a man, who they
believe to be a bear poacher, and soon follow him as he exposes that the
government has been hiding trolls from the public.
The
character of Hans (Otto Jesperson) is the true character that keeps the
movie grounded and makes it cool. He is a troll hunter. He is a
government worker, tired of being underpaid and overworked, and hunting
the most dangerous/largest mammal walking on land. He is mysterious,
paranoid and a total badass. The crew joins him and soon they see the
awesome trolls, begin learning about them and how Hans does his job.
I
really loved this movie for its awesome mythos it creates and “Norway’s
hero” Hans. Just remember kids, when you follow a man, who is hunting a
dangerous and mythical creature, into the woods and he asks whether
you’re a Christian remember what Jack’s giant used to say, “Fee! Fi! Fo!
Fum! I smell the blood of a Christian man!”
90. Horsemen. 2/5. This
movie was a “mind-f***,” but it is not in the same vein as Old Boy. It
is a mediocre serial thriller in the same vein as Se7en but lacking the
talent to take the exciting ideas in the film and pull it off. Instead,
we received a mediocre film that fails to work. There is one scene in
the movie that feels very out of place but that is mostly because, while
good, it comes out of nowhere. What knocked this film from a 3 or maybe
even a 4 are the twists it takes.
The film is about
Dennis Quaid, a dental expert and detective, on the case to discover the
brutal murderers of a mother (and others). At first, the film seems
fairly typical. Then it takes a dramatic and disturbing turn that is
unnecessarily disturbing. The movie’s serial killer theme IS
interesting. Four killers, each representing a horseman of the
apocalypse, is killing people who have wronged them and hope to send out
a message to the apathetic youth of the world to rise up against their
family and loved ones.
The problem is that the twists the film takes with this idea don’t work and, in the end, I was left angry and vengeful.
RANT ABOUT HORSEMEN! Dennis
Quaid. You and everyone else involved in the making of this film needs
to understand something. After the first twist and supremely disturbing
moment of this movie, it went from a boring 3 to a disgusting 2, and I
swore if the movie ended the way I predicted it would end that me and my
buddies would dress up like the four horsemen of the Apocalypse, buy
motorcycles and systematically punish everyone involved with this film.
And then it ended the way I predicted. Just saying. I called Death.
91. Wristcutters: A Love Story. 3/5. This
is a rather cool movie. It answers the question, in its own way, of
what might happen to someone who commits suicide in the after world.
Much like limbo is described by some other people; it is described as
being like our world but more boring/depressing. Our protagonist kills
himself after being dumped and is soon thrown into this world. The movie
apathetic and takes its time. After all, everyone involved still seems a
little depressed. He soon makes friends and goes on a quest to find his
girlfriend after discovering she killed herself not long after he did.
The movie takes some interesting and quirky turns but really the
funniest character is the protagonist’s best friend, Eugene (Shea
Whigham).
Maybe on another viewing of
this film I would give it a four but it was a little too gloomy. If
you’re looking for a good dire and gloomy film to watch with someone you
love than this is for you.
92. Above the Law 2/5. Woof.
After this film, I’m done with Seagal until I can get my hands on a
copy of Under Siege. This film would actually be tolerable if it wasn’t
for its greatest crime. The first thirty minutes set up the last hour
but do so in such a way that it seems like nothing is happening and is,
quite honestly, boring. I honestly don’t have much more to say about
this film other than that the final confrontation is as anti-climactic
as the beginning is slow and ponderous.
93. Suckerpunch. 4/5. I
don’t know or understand exactly why everyone came down so hard on this
film. I guess it is a tie between Zach Snyder hate and maybe feminists?
I guess I’m a sucker but I like Snyder’s style and his films. Hell,
Watchmen is a 5/5 for me, despite how fans will winge about the lack of
psychic octopus. So, let’s look past the Zach Snyder hate and get into
the film. Suckerpunch is about a young woman, nicknamed Baby Doll (Emily
Browning), is taken to a mental asylum after she witnesses her
stepfather murder her sister. She soon discovers that unless she can
escape within a week, she will be lobotomized and therefore, hatches a
plan to collect the items necessary to escape. Most of the movie takes
place in Baby Doll’s dream world, where the asylum becomes a burlesque
house/bordello, the girls are dancers and the warden is their pimp but
goes even deeper. From within this dream state, when our protagonists go
to take the tools for their escape, we are transported into even more
fantastic worlds with amazing sights from giant mecha samurai to
steampunk zombie Nazis to orc sieges to dragons to robot train
robberies. The movie is mostly a visual treat.
In fact, if
the movie has anything to attract anyone, it is the incredible visuals
presented, that while in Snyder’s dark pallet, in a variety of shades
and hues. The acting is sufficient for the simple characters and the
plot is simple too but that is because the film doesn’t need either.
This is a rare film. What some people may protest too and may have
judged the movie too quickly on was that while the protagonists are
women that they become sexual objects. I would argue that with a movie
that is more about watching awesome set pieces that everyone and
everything is an object.
This movie is not deep. It
doesn’t need to be. It’s the difference between a multi-layered cake and
a tub of icing. A multi-layered cake is more substantial and impressive
but sometimes I just want a tub of icing. So, Suckerpunch isn’t a game
changer and isn’t going to change anyone’s minds about Zach Snyder but
for someone looking for an incredibly beautiful and exciting experience,
look no further than Suckerpunch.
94. Dreamscape. 3/5. Oh,
Dennis Quaid. We decided to check out how you got your start as the
poor man’s Harrison Ford. Instead, we found the forebearer to INCEPTION,
which supports my impending war against anti-Nolanites that INCEPTION
rips off Scrooge McDuck. The concept of going into other people’s dreams
isn’t that new of a concept. Hell, you can trace it back to Native
American and Aborigine culture. The film involves a guy getting involved
with a research program where people with psychic ability, being forced
to help them out with their dreams and fix them if they can. There is
devious government plans to use the research plan for less noble means
than helping people with their nightmares
In the end, I
don’t have much to say about it because I found it boring. It was by no
means bad and some of the effects were interesting but in the end I’d
rather watch another dreamsploring movie.
95. The Accidental Spy. 2/5. Unfortunately,
this is another film that I do not have much to say about. It is a
return to form for Jackie Chan. The film involves Jackie Chan’s
character discovering that his biological father, that left him at an
orphanage as a child, was a Korean double agent. He is soon drawn into a
treacherous fight for his life between a group of drug dealers and
American government trying to use him as a pawn.
The film
might’ve worked better but it has a major flaw. It takes itself far too
seriously for the whacky martial arts movie that it appears to be most
of the time.
96. I Love You, Phillip Morris. 5/5. Jim
Carrey stars as Steven Jay Russell in one of the most incredible
stories of all time. Steve Jay Russell has a perfect life, he is a
well-liked policeman married to a beautiful and devout wife and a great
family life. Oh, I forgot, he is gay and a conman. It doesn’t take long
for the clever criminal to end up in prison. It is there he meets the
love of his life, Phillip Morris (Ewan McGregor), and from that point
Steve will do whatever it takes to stay with Phillip. From imitating a
lawyer to breaking out of prison, Steve’s exploits grow more ridiculous
with every new con. The most incredible part of the story is that it’s a
real story. To quote the movie, “This really happened. It really did.”
What unfolds is a charming romantic comedy that could only work with two
men, and a protagonist searching for his identity through crime.
This
truly is an award worthy performance for Carrey. The actor has an
incredible ability to use his energy and schizophrenic personality to
bring even the poorest written character to life. Luckily, this movie
has a swell script, filled with hilarious characters and quotable
dialogue that will stick with me for a while. Carrey really brings it
home with this movie, creating a character that is all at once likeable
but always up to something that is, truly, criminal. The whole cast
does their job very well, with Ewan giving us a somewhat airheaded but
good love interest and minor characters making their time worthwhile.
In
the end, this is probably the funniest film I have seen this year and I
would recommend to anyone mature enough to enjoy the movie without
being disturbed by the homosexual content.
97. North. 1/5. This
film is a real whoozy. North (Elijah Wood) is a perfect kid. He is a
star athlete, good student and obedient son. Despite all of this, his
parents don’t seem to appreciate him at all. So what is a kid to do?
Well, after nearly having a heart attack from the stress his parents
gave him, he decides to go to his special spot in the mall. There he
meets the Narrator (Bruce Willis) who gives him some advice. He then
decides to divorce his parents. This is where the movie goes from
annoying to agonizing. The judge gives him two months to find new
parents, return to his new parents or end up in an orphanage. This
creates a media frenzy and everyone wants a piece of North. He travels
the world looking for the perfect parents and the movie antagonist
Winchell (Matthew McCurley), an evil kid who wants to use North’s
popular idea to create a revolutionary movement that changes the dynamic
between kids and their parents forever. So that is the ridiculous plot
for this ridiculous movie. But that doesn’t even describe the movie
accurately.
This movie is just terrible. The jokes all
fall flat and sometimes are just weird. The dialogue written for the
kids is far too adult and the dialogue for the adults is far too
childish. The acting is dry and not for lack of talent. A young Elijah
wood is joined by Bruce Willis, Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus,
Jon Lovitz, Alan Arkin, Dan Aykroyd, Reba McEntire, Kathy Bates, Abe
Vigoda, Ben Stein, John Ritter, and Scarlett Johansson just to name the
ridiculous cast in this poorly received flop. The whole movie is boring
and I was so desperate for a decent joke that I think I only laughed at a
visual joke in the first 20 minutes and spent the rest groaning and
cursing the name of the film’s director Rob Reiner.
Yet,
what knocks it down from just being a mediocre 2? This movie is terribly
offensive and racist. Kathy Bates plays an Inuit mother and wears the
Inuit equivalent of black-face. This is just a sample of the terrible
stereotypes this movie thrusts upon the audience that it assumes would
be children. Avoid this movie at all costs.
98. From Paris with Love. 5/5. This
movie is a no-holds-barred action flick that revs up from 0 to 250 mph
in no time. Between the bad ass performance of John Travolta as Agent
Charlie Wax and the intense actions scenes, this is no ordinary action
movie and has some of the greatest moments I've seen in recent years.
The American Ambassador to France’s top aide, James Reece (Johnathan
Rhys Meyers), finally gets his wish to work for the government as a
special ops agent and is paired with Charlie Wax, a total American
badass with no qualms about killing or doing what needs to be done. At
first, Reece finds it hard to work with Wax but soon finds that his
partner’s work very well.
The action in this movie is
kinetic but not so much that it’s hard to follow. This movie is pulsing
with adrenaline and laughs to keep the audience on the edge of their
seats and laughter. John Travolta really steals the show as a character
that seems a little bit crazy but cool enough for you to want to be this
guy’s friend (better than being his enemy and you know getting shot in
the head). This movie takes a lot of risks and is definitely not just
any other buddy cop or action flick of yore. This is indeed the coolest
“mother fucking” thing that Travolta has done since Pulp Fiction.
I
really find it hard not to recommend this movie to everyone unless
they’re unable to appreciate good old fashion American ultra-violence.
99. Captain America: The First Avenger. 5/5. This is not just the best comic book movie of the summer, better than
Thor, it is the best Marvel super hero movie since the modern standard of
Iron Man.
Captain America is a heritage character that has been an American icon
since World War II, when he was used as Marvel’s mascot for patriotism,
altruism, and the American way. Captain America is an interesting
character. He starts out as a nerdy asthmatic runt, Steve Rogers (Chris
Evans) from Brooklyn who doesn’t know when to give up and wants nothing
more than to serve his country in World War II. Unfortunately, he is
denied over and over again because of his physical condition. A German
scientist working for the allies notices the motivated kid and decides
to give him a chance by enlisting him in a special super soldier
program. Thus, our young hero becomes the paragon of human physical
perfection and becomes Captain America, a good symbol and a good man.
The
film takes some interesting turns in the typical super hero origin
story and combined with the World War II nostalgic setting keeps it
fresh. What really sets this movie on par with Iron Man is an excellent
cast, with Chris Evans turning in excellent performance and cameos from
Tommy Lee Jones and other great actors, an excellent script and action. A
great example of this movie’s fresh humor is a scene where Captain
America is chasing a baddie from HYDRA (The evil Nazi super science
division) through New York, the bad guy tosses a kid he was using as a
body shield into the harbor. It briefly seems like Captain America is
going to have to make a choice between saving the kid and catching the
bad guy when the kid tells him, “Don’t worry I can swim,” and our hero
is off. This is a great example of how expectations are defied and great
dialogue/delivery saves this movie from being another
Spiderman.
If
The First Avenger is any indicator of the future of Marvel studios, and the quality to be expected in
The Avengers (2012), than we have a reason to be very optimistic. Just remember, STAY AFTER THE CREDITS! Trust me, this time, it’s worth it.
100. TRON: Legacy. 4/5. When
TRON came out, in 1982, it was a technically innovative film that
became a cult classic. It is renowned for being one of the first major
films to integrate computer animation and live actors. While not
necessarily as innovative, the sequel is an impressive technical
achievement.
Legacy is a sequel to the original film, taking
place about two decades after Nick Flynn (Jeff Bridges) went missing.
His son, Sam (Garrett Hedlund) goes looking for him and ends up inside
of the Grid, a universe within the computer system that his father
created. Sam is soon thrown into a struggle to escape with his father
and defeat the evil dictator and copy of his father CLU (Jeff Bridges)
who has turned the Grid into the epitome of tedium and eventually
destroy/control everything. The film is difficult to pin down.
Legacy
is one of the most visually impressive live action films that Disney
has ever made and, combined with the expertly composed sound track from
Daft Punk, pulls of a visual feast of glowing lights and pulsing beats.
The modernized world of the Grid is just as impressive and in many ways
more so than the version from the original film. Furthermore, the movie
is built on a very smart mythos, as smart as the
Matrix sequels
minus the cryptic for cryptic sake delivery that killed them. Where the
movie falls short is in the writing. The characters are less than 2-D
or even 3-D, being flat and uninteresting (perhaps save the dynamic
between Bridges’ characters) and the plot takes a lot of dumb twist and
turns to reach its conclusion.
In the end,
TRON: Legacy is a worthy sequel and one of the most underappreciated films of the last season.
FUN FACT: Disney trusted the
TRON sequel to Joseph Kosinski.
Legacy
is the first film he had directed, according to IMDb. Ironically, he
directed videogame trailers for games such as Halo and Gears of War.
101. The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. 5/5. This
movie is about iconic as westerns come. The third film in Sergio
Leone’s Dollar trilogy, it sets itself apart from films of the period
because of its darker tone. The film pulls few punches. The film
revolves two unlikely partners in crime. The first character introduced
is The Ugly, Tuco (Eli Wallach), a Mexican bandit who, though he is a
despicable character and used as comic relief, is likeable and proves
his deadliness on several occasions. The Good, “Blondie”, AKA The Man
With No Name (Clint Eastwood), a sharp shooting bounty hunter and the
definition of a serious killer. The last character is The Bad, Angle
Eyes (Lee Van Cleef), a ruthless, unfeeling and sociopathic mercenary
who’s only honorable trait is, no matter what, he finishes the jobs he
is paid to do. The characters discover a treasure that they all want and
that’s when the race begins. The race involves lots of twists, turns
and betrayals with the outcome never certain for a moment. Meanwhile,
this all takes place on the backdrop of the Civil War.
The
acting is superb in this film with each of the three main characters
displaying a great chemistry and in every action they imply a
complicated past. Also, they display themselves as about as true as you
can get desperados and badasses. This whole movie takes on a tone and
the director argues that, despite critical reception that said the movie
was too negative and grim, that the film more accurately shows off the
time period. The characters, even Blondie, are all deceptive and
sketchy. The cynical nature of having this petty race for riches amongst
the backdrop of the civil war paints the West well and those won it (or
lost it). The writing is superb and nothing is taken lightly in this
film.
Everything in this film seems just about perfect and
I have very few complaints. Once again, while I enjoy a good long
movie, the length can be a tad discouraging. My favorite element was the
music. Ennio Morricone's score is instantly recognizable and epic. My
favorite character was oddly enough Tuco.
