FANTUM MENUS IS BEST MOVIE!
best movie ever [I dunno how to enunciate cuz I'm a o-possum!]
truth
1.I may just be an o-possum...
...but I knows a gud movie when I seen it!
See, I was just a baby o-possum, clingin' to the back of mah mama and she was just a crawlin' 'round the fat legs of these hyoomans to look for nummies on the cinema's sticky floors (so much gud stuff down there!) when I seen my first and only movie...
JORJ LUKASS'S THE FANTUM MENUS!
The movie's about this frog-rabbit guy named Jar-Jar Binks who, on the run from some "bombad baddies", meets up with a pair of borin' city boys on Spring Break. The whole movie hinges on whether Jar-Jar can loosen their underoos up and teach them how to party!
And, a-course, there's a subplot where Jar-Jar is gunna have to get a job at like Walmart or somethin' or his Mama (I glued a picture of her but-her-face up above) is gonna kick him out of Atlantis! So, like, Jar-Jar has to teach his new friends about how to party, find a job, and make us all laugh in one movie! He's a great comedic actor-- like Adam Sandler but with less of a Jewy voice!
We've all been there (points above with claw) haven't we fellas? One second you're wanderin' around the power station and, before you can say "don't chew on that", you're buddy is burnt blacker than a black thing. Lucky for Jar-Jar, he's a profeshunal acter and he knows wut he's a-doing!
At supper, Professer Liam Neeson is all hoity toity cuz Jar-Jar is tryin' to entertain some like poor trailer park family with his awesum possum tung tricks! Ah mean, wut's the point of havin' a tung like that if'n ya ain't gonna use it to entertain. The next part I kinda blacked out cuz on account of mah o-possum diabetes and didn't wake up until mah mama stuck my face in a tub of not yo cheese! I love not yo cheese!
IT MAKES ME WANNA DANCE! This one time me and mah buddies was at Wal-Mart and like mah buddy Franklin (he's a turdle) got ran over by one of them scooters with the big persons on 'em but he were all right cuz he's a turdle. He got a cash settlement for like cash money, so we thought we'd start having these "axidents" more often! Stupid hyoomans! That's how I got this cushy job! The internet boy stepped on my tail! Wait...what was I s'posed to be a-doin' again?
Coulda swore I wrote it down on mah hand...
So, like, Jar-Jar meets like this city girl Princess Natalie Portman and she's givin' him the old Eskeemo shoulder and Mr. Long-Ears is playin' it all cool! I'm pretty sure he ends up with Natalie Portman in the next movie, but I never did done seen it cuz on account of mah bein' a o-possum. BUT, I herd there is like five more movies, so I'm sure he'll get her in the end...
In the next wacky scene, Jar-Jar finds himself on like a battlefield, on the green grassy fields of Iraq, and he like single-handedly wins the whole shebang in a funny way. I mean, people die, but that's like war and stuff. Good thing Jar-Jar is there to keep everything funny cuz the last thirty minutes of this movie were a little too smart for this ol' o-possum.
The movie ends with Jar-Jar teaching his friends how to have fun ('cept for Liam Neeson who gets burnt to death for some reason), saves Atlantis from Obama, and reunites with his Mama who tells him he prolly got a future politickin' in Washington. I'm sure he don't like doom everybody to bein' ruled by an evil old and stuffy white guy-- he's a Republikan and Republikans work for us (o-possums included). I'd reckon-mend this movie to just about anyone out there that loves a gud comedy.
