NERDCULTURE SMACKDOWN! POKEMONS OF THE WEEK! #3

POKEMONS OF THE WEEK! #3

CROBAT & SWOOBAT! <3

That's right, kiddiddlies! I didn't forget this time! As a reward for your loyalty, or shall we say friendship, we're talking about two bat Pokemon that evolve via, cornily enough, friendship. Yes, seriously, #169 Crobat and #528 Swoobat, both can only be obtained through friendship. And really, how can you not like that? What are you a monster? Yeesh, what a Goldbat.

LAST WEEK'S POKEMONS OF THE WEEK: POLITOED & SLOWKING

MIXED BAG. SHADOW COMPLEX REVIEW!

MIXED BAG PRESENTS

SHADOW COMPLEX REVIEW!

Developer: Chair Entertainment, Epic Games
System: XBOX 360 (2009)
Genre: Side-Scrolling Platformer/Action/Adventure

WORD OF THE DAY! 1/26/13.

rubble [ruh-buhl]
noun

1. Broken bits and pieces of anything, as that which is demolished.

2. Any solid substance, as ice, in irregularly broken pieces.

3. Rough fragments of broken stone, formed by geological processes, in quarrying, etc., and sometimes used in masonry.

4. Masonry built of rough fragments of broken stone. 

 EX.  Gather round the fire and listen up or I'll throw you into the fire.Today we're talking about this weekend's pre-release, on the 26th and 27th, for the newest MTG set and second part of the Return to Ravnica Block, GATECRASH! I explained how I felt about choosing those pacifists gardeners last time with my Selesyna article (CLICK HERE) and this time I went with the Alpha guild, Gruul! This is the guild to choose if you want to live by only two commands from our leader, the cyclops Borborygymos, "Crush them!" and "We eat!" This guild is about crushing your opponent with your superior might-- unlike Selesnya's focus on cooperation and the greater good, the Gruul Clans don't focus on anything but freedom. In our guild, might = right. Lemme explain what I'm looking forward to.

(CHECK OUT MY OTHER MTG ARTICLES)

Instead of looking at the Gruul Charm (which I like but don't really love like I do Selesnya Charm), lets look at the Gruul Guildmage! Every guild has its own guildmage and Skarrg definitely represents what his guild is all about-- first, Gruul's gonna have the biggest creatures (which need trample to really shine), secondly, Gruul knows how to use lands (ramping up, using them to make creatures, and using them to burn (cuz thirdly Gruul loves to burn). This is the guild to choose if you wanna be roflpwn your opponent's with big fat sledgehammers until they're a pile of rubble. This bloodlust needs a little boost and that's what Gruul's new mechanic is all about!

Ghor-Clan Rampager is probably my favorite card with the Gruul mechanic Bloodrush. Bloodrush allows you to trade a creature, usually for a bargain price from your hand, for a boost to one of your attacking creatures. This would seem like a drawback except for the fact that this mechanic cannot be countered by spells and Gruul has ways to creatures back from the graveyard. Turning your fatty monster into an even fatter monster to crush everything in its path is what Gruul is all about because its what green/red is all about!

I'm hoping that Gruul is gonna do what G/R does best-- giving you the fattest creatures with the best advantages in combat. The most important part of that formula is red and green's ability to ramp up mana, ramp up destruction, and crush everything! Green and Red are about instinct, passion, impulse, and with two most aggressive colors in my arsenal I should be able to see a millions faces and rock them all!

Like our Alpha says, "Not Gruul? Then die!"

WORD OF THE DAY! 1/25/13.

rogue [rohg]
noun
1. A dishonest, knavish person; a scoundrel.
2. A tramp or vagabond.
3. A playful trickster or scamp; a mischief maker.
4. Dungeons & Dragons/Fantasy. A thief character capable of stealthy combat, versatile skills, such as sleight of hand and fast talk, and other tricks of sneaky and/or cunning variety.

EX. I tried to make a stealthier spellthief sorta rogue when I played Skyrim, but I always ended up getting distracted and just making my guy an uber monk who beats people to death with his bare hands and uses magic to stay alive longer than he should ever be able to manage.

WORD OF THE DAY! 1/24/13.

giraffe [juh-raf]
noun
1. A tall, long-necked, spotted ruminant of Africa that is the tallest living quadruped in the world.

EX. Giraffe Park sounds a lot safer than Jurassic Park. Plus, it would be fun to watch a full-length feature film where Jeff Goldblum riffs on giraffes.

WTF WED! DEXTER'S LAB: DEXTER'S RUDE REMOVAL!

WTF WEDNESDAY PRESENTS

UNAIRED EPISODE OF DEXTER'S LAB:

DEXTER'S RUDE REMOVAL!

Perhaps, to many a kid who grew up watching Cartoon Network back in the day, one schoolyard myth was passed around enough to where it had to be true-- there was an episode of Dexter's Lab so offensive that it never aired. Usually, you hear about this stuff after it hits the air and is quickly tossed in the vault by the network after a volley of protests from parents pissed off and trying to protect their pampered tots. But supposedly, there was an episode that was so vile it hadn't seen the light of day and it would go on as a legend amongst animation fans and 90's kids.

14 Years Later...

Adult Swim airs the episode in its entirety and posts in on youtube. If you haven't had a chance to check it out, please do. The episode is about Dexter creating a machine to remove rudeness. Instead, it splits Dexter & Dee Dee into a good pair and a foul-mouthed evil pair. Did I mention the latter pair cusses a lot? Cuz its hilarious! They bleep it out, which in my opinion adds to the comedy, and you just won't believe an episode got so close to airing with such foul language! Click the link in the title and enjoy 7 min. of naughty nostalgia that you can't even remember.

WORD OF THE DAY! 1/23/13.

replicant [rep-luh-kent]
noun
1. Science Fiction (Blade Runner, 1982). A bio-engineered or bio-robotic being created in the universe of Ridley Scott's film, Blade Runner. These artificial life forms, often derogatorily called "skin jobs", were created to perform slave labor and tasks deemed too dangerous for biological humans, but complex enough for a humanoid to be a necessary tool in the completion of said tasks. They are virtually identical to a human being, but have super strength, agility, and variable intelligence (depending on the model) with a shelf-life or life-span of approximately four years.

They became illegal, on Earth, after a bloody mutiny on off-world site, and are hunted down as dangerous machines to be put down, also known as "retired", by individuals known as "Blade Runners". The most often used method to identify a replicant is a test to expose their emotional responses and empathy, which are limited by design.

EX. An Example of a Voight-Kampff Test Being Performed on a Suspected Replicant

WEEKLY ROUND-UP! 1/14-1/20/13.

WEEKLY ROUND-UP PRESENTS

"HIS NAME IS LINK, MUTHA F***A!" WEEK!

7. WORD OF THE DAY! 1/16/13. Gainfully

I was sick last week, but this week it seems like everything is coming up Goldar!

6. WORD OF THE DAY! 1/17/13. Audiovisual.

I think everyone is pretty hyped for the new Pokemon games for 3DS-- I will hopefully post updates for X & Y as quickly as they materialize.

5. MUSICAL MONDAY! JON TRON RAP!

Is "gorily" a word? I don't think its a word. Maybe it should be a word?

4. WORD OF THE DAY! 1/19/13. Earn.

I finally beat Mass Effect 3. I got the ending I wanted and, while I agree that the three-door ending was crap, I think the anger directed towards the game was probably more than it deserved and, I think if you ignore the ending, it is easily a 5/5 title.

3. WORD OF THE DAY! 1/15/13. Handicraft.

I felt like sharing some of my own handicrafts for you guys by showing off the X-Mas cards I made for my friends. Some can be a little sappy, but there is nothing that I am more grateful for than my friends & family.

2. WTF WED! HOARDERS: POKEMON EDITION!

Pokemon is something that I love, but it also torments me so. I've accepted that Pokemon is about the fun and not about "catching 'em all."

1. MIXED BAG. PODCAST #5 EVIL DEAD LOCALIZED GEORGE LUCAS!

We finally got to post the fifth Mixed Bag Podcast. The topics were the new Evil Dead film trailer, anime localization, and Disney buying Lucasfilm.

WORD OF THE DAY! 1/22/13.

The Great Chain of Being
noun
1. Philosophy. The scala naturae (Latin, literally: "ladder or stair-way of nature"), is a classical Christian and Western medieval concept detailing a strict, hierarchical structure of all matter and life, believed to have been decreed by God.

EX. Today's comic is, to my pleasant surprise, based on lyrics from Kanye West's No Church in the Wilds feat. Jay-Z and Frank Ocean. The lyrics appear to be a beautiful perversion of The Great Chain of Being, which is better described as a pyramid as it attempts to prescribe a hierarchy to the universe with the lowest animals on the bottom, followed by more complex animals, with animals like lions higher up, followed by humans, then angels, then God at the top. It actually reminds me of a question I've heard posed in several different ways, but also eloquently by Terry Pratchett's DEATH in The Hogather (go read this book or watch the film):

"Humans need fantasy to be human. To be the place where the falling angel meets the rising ape."

My question, when it comes to philosophy, is would you rather be ashamed of humanity or be proud of it? Do you supress it or progress it? Would you rather be the falling angel or the rising ape?

Also, "Spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaccee!"

NERD CULTURE SMACKDOWN! POKEMONS OF THE WEEK #2

POKEMONS OF THE WEEK #2

POLITOED & SLOWKING

That's right guys, I know I kinda flaked on posting this on the right day, but it would feel wrong to neglect this sort of new article I've been testing so quickly; as such, I ran the number generator to come up with doing #186 Politoed and #199 Slowking who share the unique place in Pokedom of evolving via trade and exposure to King's Rock.

Check out last week's article on Electivire & Magmortar.

MUSICAL MON! SUPER MARIO RPG PLAYING GAME GRUMP ANDROIDS?

MUSICAL MONDAY PRESENTS

SUPER MARIO RPG: WALTZ OF THE FOREST

First up we begin with something a little more in our general ballpark-- a legit Kirbopher animation remixing a fan-f***ing-tastic Super Mario track to give us a chilling and enchanting look at the world created by the SNES classic, Super Mario RPG. I especially like the way they capture some of the darker undertones present in the Super Mario 'verse.

GAME GRUMPS: BABOOM REMIX!

Honestly, the most appealing part of the Grumps is there dedicated fanbase. I dunno, maybe I just like having something to look forward to every day (blame it on my OCD or something) but the Grumps fulfill an important place as background audio for my dishwashing, writing, etc.

CYBERPUNK 2077 TRAILER!

I love Bladerunner. I love Ghost in the Shell.  I love Shadowrun. I've never even played the pen and paper rpg that this new video juego is based on (Cyborg 2020), but I wanna love it. So, you can bet your keister I am excited to play this new title from the guys who brought us The Witcher series-- I found about this trailer via Spoony and he sold me on it without the trailer. The best part? The trailer is gorgeous, sets up emotional conflicts in a awesome looking setting, and, oddly enough, one of the best parts is the soundtrack. Check it out.

WORD OF THE DAY! 1/21/13.

meh [meh]
interjection
1. An expression of boredom or apathy towards a situation.
adjective
2. Unimpressive and/or boring.
3. Bored or apathetic.

EX. I really hope that you nerds out there take this meme to 11 and we see Thranduil deciding to turn his back on literally dozens of tragedies rather than coming to their aid with a small army of elves and his giant Stag god thing. One does not simply make a meme-- but that doesn't mean we should give up on this new "Lord of the Meh" meme.

WORD OF THE DAY! 1/20/13.

discern [dih-surn]
verb

1. To perceive by the sight or some other sense or by the intellect; see, recognize, or apprehend.

2. To distinguish mentally; recognize as distinct or different; discriminate.

EX. Either Prof. Oak can't discern a person's gender by their appearance, voice, and mannerisms or he is terribly polite/sensitive to crossdressers and transgendered individuals. Or he lives in a Japanese video game anime verse where such questions are necessary due to the profusion of gender ambiguous characters.